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Drabblecast B-Sides 20 – In Search of The Burmese Floridian Python with Connor Choadsworth

Drabblecast B-Sides cover 20, In Search of the Burmese Floridian Python with Connor Choadsworth, by Bo KaierPallid, oddly-accented Cryptozoologist Connor Choadsworth and his slack-jawed, knuckle-dragging camera man Jeff journey deep into the Florida Everglades in search of the elusive and decidedly misplaced “Burmese Floridian Python…”

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Drabblecast B-Sides 20 – In Search of The Burmese Floridian Python with Connor Choadsworth

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Cover for Drabblecast episode 270, The First Conquest of Earth, by Richard K. Green

Drabblecast 270 – The First Conquest of Earth

Cover for Drabblecast episode 270, The First Conquest of Earth, by Richard K. GreenWhen the alien fleet was first sighted just beyond the asteroid belt, end-of-the-world riots broke out in cities around the globe. But when astronomers calculated that the huge, silent ships would take nearly three weeks to reach Earth, all but the most committed rioters felt their enthusiasm wilt. By the end of the day they’d all dropped their bricks or bats and slunk home, plundered consumer electronics in hand, muttering about the aliens’ apparent lack of urgency...

Drabblecast B-Sides 18 – On the Vinegar Valves of Venus

Cover for Drabblecast B-Sides 18, On the Vinegar Valves of Venus, by Bo KaierMonsignor’s Log, stardate the Millennium Feast of Saints Blot & Cugat…

It was a very special day, so I wore the least tatty of my vestments. The chasuble is only slightly frayed, the stains on the cincture have faded, the alb, granted, is little better than a rag.  I cannot get the grease out of the amice, and the stole is in tatters. The less said about the maniple the better. But by adjusting the lighting so it played through the cobwebs I think only the sharpest-eyed of congregants will have noticed. I did my best to disguise the stink by spraying the chapel with an aerosol can of Essence of Blood of the Lamb. It was decocted, of course, not from the real blood of a real lamb, but from chemical compounds manufactured in the lab by boffins. I have seen pictures of so-called “real” lambs in a codex. They look like tinier versions of sheep, if, that is, they were drawn to scale. Who knows?

Cover for Drabblecast episode 262, My True Lovecraft Gave to Me, by Rodolfo Arredondo

Drabblecast 262 – My True Lovecraft Gave to Me

Cover for Drabblecast episode 262, My True Lovecraft Gave to Me, by Rodolfo ArredondoDear Mr. Kugelmacher,

This letter is to inform you of my resignation. As you know, I have spent the last fifteen years of my life working in your department store, from the age of twelve when I was hired as a stock boy, to my years spent in the jewellery department, to my time in management. I have loved working here, and I am very sorry to leave, but I fear that if I remain any longer, my health and my sanity will be forfeit. Perhaps if I explain the events of weeks, it will become clearer why I have to quit.

Drabblecast 252 – The Elder Thing and the Puddle People

Cover for Drabblecast episode 252, The Elder Thing and the Puddle People, by Matt WasielaUpon the coming of the rain and the and the reawakening of the Krr’at race, the Elder Thing returned to us and squealed Its sky-splitting squeal and waded in among us. It came with the green feet that had eyes and mouths, and with the yellow, rubbery outerskin, and with the lace and the glitter — oh, the horrible, horrible glitter…

This episode of the Drabblecast continues H.P. Lovecraft Tribute Month, specifically focusing on the frequent appearance of cults in Lovecraft’s work. In the drabble, cult meetings aren’t always all about sacrifices and secret rites. In the feature, what starts out as an innocent encounter between a little girl and her imaginary friends takes an ominous turn when the “puddle people” turn out to be real creatures who worship her as their capricious god. When a rebel revolts against the the cult to save her daughter from being sacrificed, how will their deity react?

Cover for Drabblecast episode 250, Trifecta 22, by Liz Pennies

Drabblecast 250 – Trifecta XXII

Cover for Drabblecast episode 250, Trifecta 22, by Liz PenniesMy name is… John.

I am…

I have a wife and a daughter. They are visiting me today. Their names– Alice. And Anna.

I can see, sort of. Everything is blurry. I am submerged in a coffin, a clear coffin with green water. There’s a tube in my mouth so that I can breathe, machine-like.

My legs are transparent. I see veins and arteries, thin muscles that look like spiderwebs bundled together. The doctors say my memory will be fuzzy. It’s supposed to come back quickly.

I am…

The theme of this Drabblecast Trifecta is “if you want something done right, you’ve got to do it yourself.” In Faithful Servant, a long-suffering butler’s poorly timed fit of temper is nearly the end of him. In Selfless, a man with an incurable illness goes to great lengths to ensure his wife and daughter enjoy a normal, happy life. In Prophecy Negotiations, a fateful farm boy learns that if you want to rise to a new station, it pays not to accept the first offer.

Cover for Drabblecast episode 248, Cockroach Hat, by Greg Cravens

Drabblecast 248 – The Cockroach Hat

Cover for Drabblecast episode 248, Cockroach Hat, by Greg Cravens“What I don’t like about it,” said Cliffe, “is that is it’s just a metaphor instead of something real.”

“What if it was real?” I (Sam) asked. “What if it was me and I actually turned into a cockroach someday?”

This episode of the Drabblecast is all about crazy relationships. In the drabble, it’s apparent that finding Mr. Right is difficult no matter who (or what) you are. In the feature, Sam wakes up one day to discover he has been transformed into a giant cockroach. He spends the rest of his day on a surreal quest, not only to return to his normal self, but also to save his girlfriend from threats both mundane and extraordinary, with the hope a new start together.

Drabblecast B-Sides 17 – Exploring

Cover for Drabblecast B-Sides episode 17, Exploring, by Bo KaierRecorded Live at Balticon 2012

The two began their journey again, stopping at the edge of the graveyard.  “It sure looks scary in there,” the little brown-haired girl said.

What’s scary is that if you don’t get your ass moving, it’s gonna be Wednesday before I get my freak on.

“Yeah,” said Socks, tugging open the wrought iron gate.  “But nothing’s gonna stop us, cause we’re brave explorers!”

Cover for Drabblecast episode 240, Trifecta XXI, by Gino Moretto

Drabblecast 240 – Trifecta XXI

Cover for Drabblecast episode 240, Trifecta XXI, by Gino MorettoWe bought our first yarn baby at a garage sale. The ends of its arms were frayed and its eye buttons dangled loose on bare threads.

This theme of this episode of the Drabblecast is family unties: Nontraditional homes and family situations. In the drabble, the enterprising resident of a haunted house fools its ghosts into performing everyday domestic tasks. In Divorce in the House of Flies, a young boy has to deal with his parents’ divorce at the same time he has to deal with their transformation into human-shaped masses of tiny insects. In Wendigo Bake Sale, residents of a small town overcome their initial terror of a pair of wendigo participating in the school bake sale, only to be frightened anew when the wendigo reveal they are supporting the school because their child attends. In Knit, after losing their first yarn baby during her rebellious teen years in a tragic unraveling accident, a couple tries vainly to reconstruct her from the scraps of yarn, stuffing, and buttons left behind.

Drabblecast B-Sides 16 – Winning Streak

Cover for Drabblecast B-Sides episode 16, Winning Streak, by Mary MatticeSeven security gargoyles stare at me from atop the elaborate sandstone columns lining the casino’s walls. Their sharp eyes and oversized talons flex ever so slightly in anticipation of snatching up cheaters like unsuspecting prey… The pit boss watches me too, now, and for good reason. I’m an Ittari after all, a shapeshifter, just as they’d identified me with the DNA scan when I’d entered this fine establishment…

Cover for Drabblecast episode 232, Valentine's Day with the Gods, by Jerel Dye

Drabblecast 232 – Valentine’s Day with the Gods

Cover for Drabblecast episode 232, Valentine's Day with the Gods, by Jerel Dye

The first ‘Go to Hell!’
The Angels did say
To certain poor bastards
On Valentine’s Day;

‘Go to Hell!
We do our job well!
It ain’t who you are
It’s what you can sell…’

On Valentine’s Day,
The World demands Love
With a milk-chocolate fist
In a red tin-foil glove.

Romance is featured in this episode of the Drabblecast. In the drabble, falling in love with a werewolf causes problems for a vampire. In the feature, on Valentine’s Day a freshly engaged couple stops at a tavern for dinner. They are seated among a collection of deities representing various traditions and religions who lead them to question their relationship, as well as the meaning of love and marriage at all among the horrors of the cosmos.

Cover for Drabblecast episode 231, Trifec ta XX, by Brent Holmes

Drabblecast 231 – Trifecta XX

Cover for Drabblecast episode 231, Trifec ta XX, by Brent HolmesThe six of them meet for the first time in front of the sagging clapboard house where Everett Montrose was born. All are tired, with hollows under their eyes from driving or riding buses for days. Even so, they greet each other with shy, relieved smiles. Few words are said; most seem unsure of how to speak to each other. There are some handshakes, even a quick hug or two, but these interactions are awkward and all soon turn their attention to their reason for coming here. They all carry with them small pieces of Everett Montrose, and all instinctively touch the fragments as they look to the house.

This episode of the Drabblecast opens with an announcement that the Kickstarter goal for Norm’s new CD has been reached. The theme of the trifecta is Southern justice. In Whit Carlson’s Trespasser, chronic bellyacher Whit Carlson makes a complaint to the sheriff about a clown fishing on his property. In The Six Pieces of Everett Montrose, six strangers meet in front of the house where Everett Montrose was born and where his brother still lives. Each has been compelled to return the bone fragment he or she has found. In Boll Weevil, a man drives home through a plague of boll weevils to face the end of the world. Whether they are a bioweapon, a biblical plague, or aliens, the boll weevils have survived the winter and started breeding wildly, injecting their babies into people with each bite. After containment and quarantine have failed to stop them, a scorched earth policy is about to be enacted. The episode concludes with a bit by Hearty White reading a poetry submission rejection letter.

Cover for Drabblecast 224, Doubleheader X, by Mary Mattice

Drabblecast 224 – Doubleheader X

Cover for Drabblecast 224, Doubleheader X, by Mary MatticeJames Kennedy had stared at his sock drawer for a good ten minutes that first morning, dumbfounded. He’d never seen it so neat, and he didn’t remember doing it. But there they were: threadbare, but tidy and folded…

Another Drabblecast doubleheader special, featuring two stories from from author John P. Murphy.

Help support Norm’s New CD: The Esoteric Order of Sherman. Pre-order the Order.

Episode Sponsor: The Flash Pulp Podcast, thrice weekly pulp stories for the modern age.

Cover for Drabblecast episode 222, Rules for Living in a Simulation, by Mike Dominic

Drabblecast 222 – Rules for Living in a Simulation

Cover for Drabblecast episode 222, Rules for Living in a Simulation, by Mike DominicNow if we, like those characters in recent movies, discovered specific clues in the world around us suggesting that we do in fact live in a simulation, we would of course consider those clues carefully to see what they say about how we should live our lives. — Robin Hanson

Norm begins this episode of the Drabblecast with an introduction to the new and improved Drabblecast.org, and thanks the many contributors who made this possible. The Drabble by John Murphy remembers a simpler time in video games, though a time not free of consequence. The feature by Aubrey Hirsch provides, as described in the title, a didactic set of rules for living in a simulation (a universe constructed especially for us).

Episode Sponsor: You Shall Never Know Security by J.R. Hamantaschen.

Drabblecast 220 – Trifecta XVIII

Cover for Drabblecast episode 220, Trifecta XVIII, by Liz PenniesAnother of the Drabblecast’s vaunted Trifecta series. Three short stories, each with a unique twist. The episode begins with an interview of author J.R. Hamantaschen, Norm runs fingers through his troubled mind, learning of the seeds from which his horrors spring. The theme of this Trifecta: getting the boot – stories of rejection and alienation. First up, Richard Weems’s Bad Habit, in which a nun and a naked pervert do battle (no, really). Next, author Andrew Gudgel (featured on fellow podcasts such as Escapepod) appears with Tags, as read by Kimi Alexander, a story of teenage dares in a technologically submerged world. Lastly, A Happy Family, by author, novelist Nathaniel Tower, read by Abner Senires, in which a family receives a very unexpected bundle of joy (and puzzlement).

Episode Sponsor: You Shall Never Know Security by J.R. Hamantaschen.

Drabblecast B-Sides 15 – In Search of the Brain-Eating Nandi Bear

Cover for Drabblecast B-Sides episode 15, In Search of the Brain-Eating Nandi Bear, by Bo KaierOddly-accented cryptozoologist Connor Choadsworth once again embarks on a quest to find mythical beasts, this time in the deep jungles of Kenya “In Search of the Brain-Eating Nandi Bear.”

“The Nandi… a magical bear… a brain-eating bear…”

This is an was an exclusive podcast  originally available only to Drabblecast $10.00 a month subscribers.  Subscribe and support your favorite podcast to get access to our Drabblecast B-Sides!

Now, enjoy the show!

Drabblecast B-Sides 15 – In Search of the Brain-Eating Nandi Bear

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Drabblecast 217 – Followed

Cover for Drabblecast episode 217, Followed, by John DebergeThis episode of the Drabblecast presents “Followed” by Will McIntosh.

Norm also starts to ponder the nature of the undead. We conclude In Search of the Brain-Eating Nandi Bear serial featuring cryptozoologist Connor Choadsworth.

Following that is our feature story by Will McIntosh, author of Soft Apocalypse and the upcoming Hitchers.

Story Excerpt:

She came wandering down the sidewalk like any other corpse, her herky-jerky walk unmistakable among the fluid strides of the living.  She was six or seven, Southeast Asian, maybe Indian, her ragged clothes caked in dried mud. Pedestrians cut a wide berth around her without noticing her at all…

Drabblecast 215 – Dread Unlocks

Cover for Drabblecast episode 215, Dread Unlocks, by Bo KaierOkay, no one expects eldritch horror in LA. Not that I know what eldritch horror really is. My old boyfriend (about fifteen boyfriends back) called anything that inspired dread “eldritch horror.” I guess that would describe my entire job, really…

Another story from Lovecraft month – elder horror in LA. Dread Unlocks is on the job!

Cover for Drabblecast episode 210, The Alphabet Quartet, by Matt Schindler

Drabblecast 210 – Trifecta XVII

Cover for Drabblecast episode 210, The Alphabet Quartet, by Matt SchindlerAnother in the Drabblecast trifecta series. This time, we dip in to the Alphabet Quartet collection.

Cover for Drabblecast episode 204, DoubleHeader 8, Kelly Martinez

Drabblecast 204 – Doubleheader IX

Cover for Drabblecast episode 204, DoubleHeader 8, Kelly MartinezHere is the first joke of Betty L. Duncan. Why do the three-eyed aliens bank on the moon? Because there is not enough sun to go around. Press the blue button when you have finished laughing…

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